Why I moved on from Gatsby to Tom....

Moving on? I wouldn't exactly call it moving on, but I tried to get my mind off of Gatsby. Tom was the next best thing to Gatsby and I could have him. Who wouldn't take that over nothing? Tom was a good guy, so I thought, and Gatsby is gone. Without Gatsby, I was lost. Yes, I'll admit, I am dependent on the men in my life. So what? I like my men to be a big part of my life and they provide for me so why not. Tom filled that role while Gatsby was away. Yes, he wasn't quite like Gatsby. Actually, he was completely different from Gatsby. Jay is mysterious, charming, and loving, while Tom is serious, rough, and money-oriented. Gatsby had money, but so did Tom. Tom made sure everyone knew he had money, too. Gatsby is a little more quiet than Tom. Going from Gatsby to tom was a big difference for me. I don't know which man suited me more. I knew I needed to move on from Jay though, because a girl can't sit there and wait for a man that might never come back...

What I was feeling when Nick came to my house...

Oh, Nick visiting was such a wonderful moment! I had missed him dearly and couldn't wait to see him again. He and I have a certain connection that not many other cousins do. I mean, of course, we are second cousins once removed, but we are siblings at heart to me. He knows what I am thinking and he knows me like the back of his hand. Surely, he knew Tom too, but he had no interest in him. With Tom being the big shot in the group, Nick clung to me and made sure that I was always okay before he even thought about Tom. Family love ran deep between us and we knew we could always turn to one another. I trusted Nick very well and knew that I could always count on him. He had never disappointed me, unlike the other men in my life. Everyone else at some point had abandoned me or left me. Not Nick though, he was always present. Him coming back to see me after time apart made me feel at peace and like I was being protected and looked out for. He brought out a good side in me and I'm so grateful that he has come back into my life..

What I was thinking when I was waiting for Gatsby...

While Jay was away at war, well I was a mess. I didn't know what to do with myself and didn't belong anywhere. My true love had just gone away to war, what was I supposed to do? He told me he would be back for me. I knew as soon as he came back, he'd be running after me. I tried to wait, I really did. Being alone kept me thinking about if he was ever really going to come back. It had me thinking that maybe I shouldn't be waiting for him. What if he never came back? What would I do then? If he didn't come back, I don't know what I'd do without him. While he was away, I thought that I might as well find someone else. If it kept my mind off of Gatsby, I wouldn't care. Of course, when he came back he surely cared. I was thinking about myself, though. I was thinking that he would never come back! I thought about wasting my time waiting on him when another man could be waiting on me. Could I do that to Gatsby? I knew I wanted to be with him, but waiting on a war to end meant not knowing when he'd come home. Thinking about him made me want to wait, but thinking about myself made me want to move on with my life....